August birthdays: round two

One day, in late 1997 or early 1998, I was sitting at my desk waiting for Madame Turlo's frightfully dull French class to begin. On the other side of the room, a girl started talking about the previous night's episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This may seem insignificant, but that show was (and still is) my favorite show of all time, and I didn't know anybody else who liked it. I immediately dove across the several rows of desks. "Talk to me about Buffy," I said. No introduction necessary. No, "Hi, I'm Caitlin, what's your name?" formalities. Just POOF! Instant friend! We got to talking a little more before the bell rang, and I learned that not only was Buffy her favorite TV show, but Empire Records was her favorite movie. To a pop-culture-obsessed teenage girl living in a small town, finding another person with the same favorite under-appreciated TV series and the same favorite semi-obscure movie is like discovering some mythological creature that doesn't exist. Until it does.

Vanessa and I quickly became inseparable, and would call each other during every commercial break on Buffy night to compare notes. When Buffy wasn't on, I'd walk around the house with the phone permanently attached to my head, talking to Vanessa. She was the first person I called whenever something good/bad/funny/boring happened. I'd make her mix tapes with Bikini Kill and Sleater-Kinney on them, and she'd tell me about the Wu-Tang Clan and how she really wanted a pair of Wallaby shoes from the Wu-Wear Store. She'd sleep over at my house and we would chatter about this and that. She always asked permission before getting something out of the fridge, and my mom would always say, "Now VAN-essa, you are my other daughter (my mom has racked up several extra daughters over the years). You just take whatever you want. You don't have to ask." To which Vanessa would always reply, "When I've stayed over here 20 times, I'll stop asking." She must have stayed over 200 times, but she never stopped asking for permission to have a snack or a glass of iced tea.

As high school wore on and we got older, Vanessa and I got up to new and more interesting adventures. We'd wander around downtown Palm Springs (usually following cute boys), and then go grab dinner like a pair of fancy grown-ups. When we were seniors, I bought my own parking space and she and I sat in the August heat for eight hours painting it, resulting in deliriousness and two of the world's worst sunburns. Later that year, we ditched school a few hours early to see Bratmobile and The Donnas at the Roxy in Hollywood.

We went off to different colleges at the end of that year, but our schools were close enough for frequent visits. She'd catch the train to Fremont a few times a year to see me and her growing number of Santa Cruz friends. In 2002, for her nineteenth birthday, Jenn and I drove out to Davis to pick her up, and took her to San Francisco for the weekend. This photo was taken of Vanessa, Jenn, Vickie, and me leaning up against a building in San Francisco. We are waiting for something? Someone? I forget why we were standing around, but it's one of my favorite pictures ever.



These days, we live in different states, and we are lucky if we see each other once a year. But, whenever we get together or chat on the phone, no matter how long it's been, we become the same pair of fourteen-year-old girls who never run out of things to talk about.

Happy Rex Manning Day Nessie.